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Dear Ijeawele, or a Feminist Manifesto in Fifteen Suggestions

4.56  ·  Rating details ·  28,608 Ratings  ·  4,209 Reviews
From the best-selling author of Americanah and We Should All Be Feminists comes a powerful new statement about feminism today--written as a letter to a friend.

A few years ago, Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie received a letter from a dear friend from childhood, asking her how to raise her baby girl as a feminist. Dear Ijeawele is Adichie's letter of response.

Here are fifteen inva
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Hardcover, 63 pages
Published March 7th 2017 by Knopf Publishing Group
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Ana What is being suggested for raising girls can be used for raising boys. Encouraging boys to express themselves, and not silencing them if for example…moreWhat is being suggested for raising girls can be used for raising boys. Encouraging boys to express themselves, and not silencing them if for example they cry or say they are scared. Its about teaching them that all human beings have strengths and weaknesses, and clarifying that it does not have to do with their sex. Be the example in your son's life. If your son is hurt let him cry, scared express his fear, sad his sadness. Teach your child that there are different emotions and emotions are normal, there are some we like to feel others not ao much or not at all. When expressing anger, how to do it constructively and not destructively for example talk about it, noone should be harmed including him. Don't discourage him if he wants to wear pink, play with dolls, or play with an eazy bake oven. Most important, teach him to love and respect himself, and others. To respect everything, property, pets, plants, all.(less)
Teresa I think it was directed to girls because the letter was written for someone who has a daughter but you are right that all the advice could be used for…moreI think it was directed to girls because the letter was written for someone who has a daughter but you are right that all the advice could be used for any gender (less)

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Emily May
Apr 16, 2017 rated it it was amazing
Shelves: nonfiction, 2017, feminism
Your feminist premise should be: I matter. I matter equally. Not “if only.” Not “as long as.” I matter equally. Full stop.

I honestly cannot think of any author who writes essays as equally hard-hitting and utterly readable as Adichie does. Perhaps Roxane Gay's work could be said to be as compelling, or Ta-Nehisi Coates's work to be as powerful, but Adichie always comes out on top, for me, as someone who can write about important subjects with a conversational tone that makes them pageturners.

T
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Ariel
Apr 28, 2017 rated it it was amazing
I wanted to write a review about how wonderful this book is, but instead I think I need to tell you how necessary this book is.

About two months ago I met with Penguin who asked me if I'd do a sponsored video for this book. Having loved We Should All Be Feminists I was thrilled to work with them, and after reading this glorious little manifesto I agreed. (They sponsored that video and supplied me with the book, but this review is unrelated... I'm two months late, after all!) I got excited to make
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Emily (Books with Emily Fox)
Teach her that if you criticize X in women but do not criticize X in men, then you do not have a problem with X, you have a problem with women.

I'm actually mad that I have to return this book to the library.

I need to own this book. The author has such a way with words. She states her opinion in a matter of fact and simple way. I wish I were able to do the same but I'll have to content myself with using her quotes!

It warms my cold dead heart to know that women like her exist out there in the wor
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Nat
After having seen the scene below shared online, which was taken from this powerful short film, I immediately wanted to absorb myself in some much needed feminist literature. At which point I recalled the existence of Dear Ijeawele, which I'd gratefully received as an ARC.

*Trigger warning: rape.*

description description description description description description description description description description

In We Should All be Feminists, her eloquently argued and much admired essay of 2014, Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie proposed that if we want a fairer world we need to raise our sons and daughters dif
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Lola
Apr 17, 2018 rated it really liked it
I used to not understand why I am so opinionated, assertive and determined to be right. I am not kidding, I once was the exact replica of Hermione Granger personality-wise. I cared so much (and still do). Now I understand I have to pick my battles, but I thought maybe I was acting that way because I felt I had something to prove or was an attention-seeker.

Then my brother told me a story about my young self. I was four or five. My brother, grandmother and I were outside on the streets, spending t
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Warda
Mar 12, 2017 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
“The knowledge of cooking does not come pre-installed in a vagina.”

Chimamanda just can't do no wrong! I had the honour and the absolute pleasure of seeing and hearing her in person over the weekend in London. As expected, the event was just spectacular.

This book originated and was inspired by a friend of Chimamanda's who asked her ‘how to raise her baby girl as a feminist.’ The book is short, sweet and ridiculously impactful. The above quote is my favourite alongside many others. As she is
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Bookdragon Sean
“Teach her to love books. If she sees you reading she will understand that reading is valuable. Books will help her understand the world, help her express herself, and help her in whatever she wants to become.”

Reading, reading is so vitally important in understanding other people and differences. It develops empathy and it makes the world a better place. We should never restrict ourselves in life, men or women, it doesn’t matter as long as we do not full victim to the silly constraints impos
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Brina
Apr 04, 2017 rated it really liked it
Dear Ijeawele by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie is a letter she wrote to a close friend who has just given birth to a daughter. The friend has asked her to describe how to raise the daughter to be a feminist in Nigeria, a male centered country. Spelling out how to raise a feminist daughter in fifteen steps, this letter can be viewed as a companion piece to We Should All be Feminists and a manifesto of how to raise all children to view all people with respect.

Even though I recently read We Should All
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Evgnossia O'Hara
Aug 03, 2018 rated it it was amazing
Your feminist premise should be: I matter. I matter equally. Not “if only.” Not “as long as.” I matter equally. Full stop.


And this is all I'm gonna mention here!
Spectacular!
Read it!
Emer
Feb 07, 2017 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: Everyone irregardless of gender, sex, age or creed
"Teach her that the idea of 'gender roles' is absolute nonsense. Do not ever tell her that she should or should not do something because she is a girl.
'Because you are a girl' is never reason for anything.
Ever."

"If we don't place the straitjacket of gender roles on young children, we give them space to reach their full potential."


It feels very appropriate to be writing this review on International Women's Day 2017. Some years ago Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie was asked by a friend how she should ra
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Mia Nauca
Sep 26, 2018 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Quiero que todos lean este libro. La manera de escribir de Chimamanda es increíble: expresa sus ideas de manera clara y concisa pero sobre todo es cálida y enriquecedora; me ha dejado con ganas de leer más de ella.
Y lo haré, muy pronto.
Carol (Bookaria)
Nov 01, 2017 rated it really liked it
Shelves: 2017, non-fiction
Here's a very short book with a lot of wisdom.

Just because it's short it does not mean it is a light read, not at all.

Years ago, the author received a letter from a childhood friend who had just given birth to a baby girl. In the letter, her friend asks Chimamanda for advise on how to raise her daughter as a feminist. Oh boy, and did she deliver a response. You know she did.

The book is divided in small chapters and in each chapter there's a suggestion or topic from the author. The topics range f
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Ilenia Zodiaco
Spunti di riflessione concreti, pragmatici e chiari su quanto sia necessario il femminismo per una società giusta e una vita più felice. Utile anche per chi ha dei dubbi su femminismo "buono" e femminismo "cattivo".
P.S. Adesso non ho più scuse per non leggere "dovremmo essere tutti femministi".
Riley
Feb 06, 2018 rated it it was amazing
This might have been even better than 'We Should All Be Feminists' which I loved a lot. I found myself nodding along to everything Adichie was saying. This is largely focused on motherhood, gender roles, and how to raise your child to be a feminist.
s.penkevich
Aug 21, 2017 rated it it was amazing
Because social norms are created by human beings...there is no social norm that cannot be changed.

We’ve all heard the maxim that ‘change starts with you,’ which is something we must all take to heart and shoulder the responsibility. Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, author of the powerful novel Americanah and the powerful TedTalk We Should All Be Feminists, reminds parents how important the idea of change beginning with them is in her letter to a close friend, recently revised and published as Dear Ij
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Whitney Atkinson
Oct 30, 2017 rated it it was amazing
This book was so quotable. Very short but very powerful; I highlighted pretty much every other line. I don't intend on having kids, but this made me think a lot about how we train girls and boys to be and the gender roles we should avoid them adopting, and it was very empowering and great advice.
Flor
Oct 09, 2017 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Hermoso.!!! 💕 Me ha gustado tanto como “Todos deberíamos ser feministas” Que palabras tan sabias y que ideas tan claras tiene esta mujer.!!
Se lo recomiendo a todos, tanto hombres como mujeres.!!
Dejo algunas de las frases que más me gustaron, aunque casi todo el libro lo tengo marcado ☺

”Tu premisa femenina debería ser: Yo importo”.

”Todo el mundo tendrá una opinión de lo que deberías hacer, pero lo importante es lo que tú quieras y no lo que los demás quieran que quieras”.

”En ocasiones las madre
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Raeleen Lemay
Read for Popsugar's 2018 Reading Challenge: A Book by an author of a different ethnicity than you

I've never read anything by Adichie until now, so I had no idea how beautiful her writing would be. I mean, I've read all of the glowing reviews for Americanah, but for some reason I wasn't expecting it. As for the content on this book, I was in love with the way Adichie thinks and how clearly and concisely she gets her thoughts across in writing. I was able to speed through this book pretty quickly
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April (Aprilius Maximus)
Jun 30, 2018 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: 2018
This was great, but I wish it was more trans inclusive coz she implies multiple times that all women have vaginas.
Seemita
[Originally appeared here (with edits): http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/li...]

Feminism – A rather commonly used terms these days, with interpretations far and wide, but not necessarily, coherent. If among contemporary writers there is one who imparts veritable meaning and clarity to this much relevant and pertinent ideology, Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie would be her name.

When a friend asked Adichie how she can raise her little daughter as a feminist, Adichie shared fifteen suggestions in form of
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Lualunera
Quiero regalar este pequeño gran libro a todas las mujeres del mundo.
Joce (squibblesreads)
Dec 05, 2017 rated it it was amazing
4.5 stars! So important and wonderfully written and explained with examples. I wish it had been longer - I was imagining this as a collection/novel made up of vignettes with the author as a type of wise narrator... A+ material
Lisa
Nov 14, 2018 rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Dear Chimamanda,

I love the fact that you still write letters, that you care and stay committed to the issues that are important to the next generation. I love the fact that you write short and anecdotal letters that can be shared between my three children and myself in a library on a dark winter afternoon.

I can't say how much it means to me that you have a voice that is clear and sharp and kind enough to reach out to both my sons and my daughter. We feel the same anger you feel, and when I read
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Kristina Horner
Jul 28, 2017 rated it it was amazing
I loved this little book.
As someone getting married and starting to think about having children, this book resonated so strongly with me, and really inspired me in a couple of areas for how I want to approach my relationship and parenting. It's like in one little book she managed to summarize so many things I feel like I've learned and begun to care about in the last decade, and threw in a few more ideas as well. As soon as I finished it I immediately handed it to my fiance, to help us even furt
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Simon
Mar 08, 2017 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie has the most incredible way with words and how to get her points across with humour and hope. This, a letter to her friend who asks her 'how do I raise my daughter feminist?', was brimming with warmth and power whilst asking us all to check ourselves and how feminist we are when we say what we do and act as feminists.
Amanda
Apr 28, 2017 rated it it was amazing
Dear Ijeawele is Chimanda Ngozi Adichie's response to her friend's request for advice on how to raise her baby girl a feminist. The format of the book is a letter to the baby with fifteen suggestions. I may have enjoyed reading this even more than We Should All Be Feminists.

Many of the suggestions include changing the language we use with our daughters and examining attitudes about marriage and relationships, identity, and gender roles. I feel that many of the suggestions are already widely acc
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Sara
Mar 23, 2018 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: feminism, non-fiction
As a mother of a son and daughter(s), this book speaks to me on a deeply personal level and I hope I can raise my children with a sense of what it is to be a feminist. All I want for them all is to grow up in a society that is inherently equal to all, without any biases towards what they grow up to be.

I hope they already have some idea about the values discussed here. I'm the main earner in our family, my husband and I divided the childcare equally and I would never impose supposed views on them
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Adira
There's nothing here that's mind boggling, but it is a good beginning text for people who want to learn to incorporate more feminist teachings into their parenting skills and/or life.

If I'm being super honest, I really just want Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie to start writing novels once again. Her feminist essays come across as tepid with no real depth opposed to her novels, which present a much more in-depth picture of her subject and the Nigerian culture by using a more focused approach than just l
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Auntie Terror
Jun 12, 2018 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: sociology
4.5 stars. Very short and concise, very optimist rather than angry. I wish I knew a new mum of a girl to give this to. [prtf]
Anuradha
May 02, 2017 rated it really liked it
Recommended to Anuradha by: Emer
Emer recommended it to me and Anya was really the one who made me read this. I'm glad for her persistence.

Adichie addresses feminism slightly differently from other feminists I've seen. You see, she not only addresses issues where we hold men to a higher standard than women but also the opposite. ...the absurd idea of "men will be men", which means having a much lower standard for men , she writes at one point, and this is something I agree with. You see, by preaching things as "men will be me
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Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie grew up in Nigeria.

Her work has been translated into over thirty languages and has appeared in various publications, including The New Yorker, Granta, The O. Henry Prize Stories, the Financial Times, and Zoetrope. She is the author of the novels Purple Hibiscus, which won the Commonwealth Writers’ Prize and the Hurston/Wright Legacy Award; Half of a Yellow Sun, which won t
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“Your feminist premise should be: I matter. I matter equally. Not “if only.” Not “as long as.” I matter equally. Full stop.” 161 likes
“Teach her that if you criticize X in women but do not criticize X in men, then you do not have a problem with X, you have a problem with women.” 153 likes
More quotes…